| July
5th
Things are progressing, the acting lessons
suddenly got serious, some of the women in the class,
(I'm not the only student) are upset at my presence.
It looks to me that they don't like the idea of
a new comer getting so much attention. There's one
particular girl, she's in love with the Master,
as she calls him, she asked if I passed the test.
I don't know what she means by that, maybe
she means the question about the cross. There are
guys too, some of them are very pushy, trying to
get my attention, I'm flatter but not interested,
somehow I only think of the one they call the Master.
July 8th
Today is my audition. I'll try for the role
of the twin sister who gets killed by a madman,
she appears mostly in flashbacks leading to her
death, It's a small role, two days of shooting and
that's it....
There's one scene that worries me, I'm supposed
to be all cut up and naked and thrown off a cliff.
How will they do that?
July 9th
I got the part!!! but even better, I get to
play both sisters!!!! Margot was very helpful.
I have one of the leading female roles, Margot
has the other and another actress has the third
female leading role. The girl that call Jan The
Master has a small part, I think she was dissapointed.
I'm stunned to say the least. Jan will have
some special sessions with me from now on.
I got the part, I got the part!!! I'm going
to be an actress!!
July 15th
Things are getting wild. I had some sessions
alone with Jan, just the two of us, almost every
day, he's showing me the more difficult scenes,
when the sister is killed, for instance.
She gets tied to a beam, her arms stretched
and spread like on a cross. (So that's the reason
for the test!).
A madman cuts her up slowly with a small metal
instrument. The slow torture ends when her throat
gets slashed open and she dies.
I was not getting the idea at first. I didn't
know how to express the horror and pain. Jan told
me to work on a subtext of pain, like a tooth ache
or something. I mentioned I had a bad cut on my
foot once. He said I should imagine that cut a hundred
time worse. I couldn't.
I needed help.
He said that I should experience torture. I
asked if it was going to be real. He said ... almost
real. I said ok, I sounded fine but I was afraid.
He asked me to put on a t shirt and to meet
him in the set.
I was there promptly, barefoot, wearing the
t-shirt. He blindfolded me and dragged me to the
beam. He took my hands firmly and tied my wrists
to the hooks, pulling me up, I was on my toes. It
was torture all right, my arms felt like they were
going to break away from my body. My wrists were
tightly held and hurting, when suddenly I felt a
sharp sting across my belly and another across my
back.
He was actually hitting me!. |
