December
15th
Jan is very, very busy again, so I'm spending
a lot of time with Natasha. She's a very good friend
and I feel a closeness to her that goes beyond friendship,
in fact I think I desire her. Sometimes I feel like
this about other friends I have, two of them, one
is a model working in the US now and the other is
my Arab neighbor in France. We basically
grew up together.
Natasha is the new object of my affection.
I love her. I wonder how is Jan going to feel about
it ... if I tell him. I even fantasize about her
sometimes. I remember when we, Jan and I tortured
Marie ... I was really, really horny after it.
When Jan asked me to clean her, I was caressing
her skin, her welts. At one point Jan asked me to
kiss her. I did and very tenderly. I kissed her
back and her breasts, her feet, just like Jan does
after he whips me.
Jan took Marie's hand and tied them again to
the post, she was slightly raised, her head was
hanging back, her eyes were closed, her back was
a few inches off the floor, her ass was resting,
her legs were folded up, he straightened and opened
them a bit ... she was still naked, of course. She
was relishing the treatment, she was moaning ...
she had been mine.
Jan told me she was mine, I could do whatever
I wanted with her, I could whip her again, or free
her. I thought that perhaps she wanted him to make
love to her. He understood my thoughts. All he had
to do is look into my eyes and he knew, he pulled
the rope lifting her up until she was on her knees,
her arms stretched up. He got under her, making
her mount him, like a horse. He entered her while
she was almost hanging on top of him, she started
to move and moan. I took the whip and whipped her
until she came.
Now I imagine the same situation but with Natasha.
December 19th
I spent the last couple of days with Natasha.
I feel abandoned by Jan. He spends all night in
the editing room while I sleep alone. I understand
why, but I feel lonely, so I keep Natasha's company.
December 22nd
Finally a break, Jan is taking an entire week
or more off for Xmas and New Year's. We'll travel
again, after Xmas, we'll spend New Year's in the
tropics. In Alta Nube, with a couple of friends.
I invited Natasha but she can't come, she's going
to France to her parents. She has to go back to
the University next year.
December 26th
We had a nice Xmas with Jan and the people
around us. Very nice, lot's of presents. I was sad
because Natasha left, I miss her, I grew close to
her in the last days she was here. I told Jan about
her, he took it well, in fact we gave her a go away
party that she'll never forget. I'll see her in
France soon.
December 29th
We are at the cabin again, but we are not alone,
Jan's friends are here. One is Cathy, a 40sh, young
looking, very strange woman, a historian and anthropologist.
She's working on a book about a serpent... some
kind of ritual. Her boyfriend is much younger than
her, he's finishing University, Psychology and Social
Studies and he's an Indian. It's very unusual in
this parts for a woman of Spanish descent to be
involved with an Indian. They make a very unusual
couple. She's very, very nice and funny. We'll spend
New Years Eve with them, in a plantation under the
stars. |
